Thanks to a response a received after I posted the blog on Belonging, I decided to investigate the value of kindness. Someone had commented and said that “Kindness is underrated” and this led me to think about all the ways we can show kindness to each other. What I wondered was, how easy is it to be genuinely kind to one another? What are the aspects of kindness that we respond to best? From my perspective, one of the easiest ways to show kindness is through smiling so I decided to research the value of a smile.
Smiling is an underrated, critical, money saving act in the workplace
What do you think the cost of a smile is? When was the last time you could freely walk about your workplace, smile at people and know that they were genuinely smiling back?
Smiles are one of the most important social cues and one of the least expensive ones to give. Researchers have actually found that smiling will change the way a person will make a decision. One experiment found that people were willing to spend more money when a salesperson smiled at them.
Research also showed that “smiling” was seen to add value for people and that people were willing to forgo a monetary reward in favour of a genuine authentic smile. Imagine that! A genuine authentic smile being more valuable to someone than money. Crazy right, but true.
If you think about authentic smiling being more valuable than money, imagine how much money organisations could save in bonus payments if they genuinely and authentically smiled and cared for their people!
A genuine and authentic smile makes people feel like they are accepted
We all feel different levels of feeling accepted or rejected by people around us and that’s normal. Hopefully we all have the chance to feel loved and accepted but we can all recall those times when we felt rejected by people around us, either at work, home or other. It feels awful right. Interestingly, research found that people who knew what it was like to feel rejected were also a lot better at being able to tell the difference between a smile that was authentic and one that wasn’t. This realistically would mean that pretty much every adult knows the difference between an authentic interaction and smile and one that’s just pasted on for show.
Smiles that are not authentic are seen to negatively impact social behaviour and research showed that if someone gives you a fake smile there is a 70% – 80% chance you will reciprocate that insincere smile. If you feel rejected you are likely to return a smile that is fake because you might still need to put on a show for whoever you need to entertain be it work, home or in your community. Genuine smiles return genuine smiles and fake smiles return fake smiles and fake smiles instinctively make people feel worse.
5 reasons why smiling is important?
- A smile is one of the most important social cues for people to make them feel accepted by the group
- People will pay more attention to good social cues than to negative cues
- A genuine smile is seen as a social reward
- A fake smile will be picked up subconsciously and people will dislike it and respond accordingly
- We make decisions based on our social cues. If we feel accepted, we respond better
So, the next time you think about putting on a fake smile, think about what it might cost you, your business, your home. People will know the difference.
Dale Carnegie, the author of How to Win Friends and Influence People wrote a poem about a smile.
“The Value of a Smile” Dale Carnegie
“It costs nothing, but creates much. It enriches those who receive, without impoverishing those who give. It happens in a flash and the memory of it sometimes lasts forever. None are so rich they can get along without it, and none so poor but are richer for its benefits.
“It creates happiness in the home, fosters goodwill in a business, and is the countersign of friends. It is rest to the weary, daylight to the discouraged, sunshine to the sad, and nature’s best antidote for trouble.
“Yet it cannot be bought, begged, borrowed or stolen, for it is something that is no earthly good to anyone ’til it is given away. And if in the hurly-burly bustle of today’s business world, some of the people you meet should be too tired to give you a smile, may we ask you to leave one of yours?
“For nobody needs a smile so much as those who have none left to give.”
Enjoy your week and remember to smile genuinely ?
